Be It Unto Me According To Thy Word

As I studied the January 6-13 Come Unto Me- Individual and Family study guide I came to a paragraph about two miracles, one of a barren woman, Elizabeth, the mother of John the Baptist,  and the other, a virgin, Mary, mother of Jesus. They both had an angel come and tell of a journey they were about to embark on. Complete miracles for each one and for us, one son would provide a saving ordinance, the other to be our Savior.

I started wondering if I had to wear their shoes how would I react. Both had to hold their heads high as some in the world would judge them. Their world crashing down around as they hear the whispers of; poor Joseph espoused to Mary and her being with child, or I can’t believe Elizabeth is having a child at her age. 

Whispers are cowardly and cruel but what really hurts is what we can say face to face with each other.

As I ponder on these thoughts it came to me that I too had been warned in a dream of a hardship that would be in my future. I was eight when I had a dream that a witch would stand between me and a place I love. A piece of land that is my inheritance. The dream conveyed to how I would freely walk on that land then suddenly one day out of no where there would be an obstacle very overpowering, compelling, and scary that I could no longer go there. 

I still can feel the fear to this day that I felt in my dream. When I recall the dream I don’t see me as third person, or watching it happen again, I feel it. All the emotions that were in the dream. I felt scared, deep dispair, no hope. But my desire to return to what I knew brought an anxiousness but not an anxiety. 

In my great desire to go beyond the fence that divided me and the land I would repeatedly approach the gate only to have the witch fly toward me or jump out from a hiding place. I would walk back to where I felt safe. I would contemplate giving up. I would wait a time and try again. It felt like forever before it was impressed upon my mind that the witch is not a physical being. That it can’t touch me, hurt me. I gained confidence and walked through the gate and right towards her. As I got close she disappeared.

In my dream I feared the witch. That was my only emotion. I imagine that both Mary and Elizabeth felt fear, like all first time mothers do. The unknown can frighten anyone. The unchartered course where no matter what, this baby is coming. No changing your mind or your path. 

My pup was having her first litter and I was sitting with her as I saw the signs of impending birth. She paced and then came and sat by me as I rubbed her belly. Then up and paced again. Suddenly like a shot had rung out she jumped up on my bed. I slowly stood and with a calm voice told her “No, you can’t have them there.” As she jumped down I saw the first one crowning. I helped her remain still. After that first one was delivered I moved the pup into the dark of the closet and there she remained as the others came. I saw her fear but she calmed as instinct took over.

I feared until assurance kicked in, in my dream. In real life not so much. Luke tells us Mary was troubled in seeing the angel. The angel said to her “Fear not.” After the angel explained the reason for the visit she said “Be it unto me according unto thy word.” 

No wonder she was chosen. She had a great trust and love in her a God. 

As I read that I decided to make a list in my morning study note book. I had two columns, one I labeled Unbecoming the other Becoming. Thinking my emotions had plenty of times not been very becoming of me. But as I accepted, studied, looked and found the hand of the Lord in my trials I was becaming. Became who I was born to be.  Not there, but becoming.

My “un” list side reads like a horror script. The words I chose to describe my emotions and ugly desires. But my “be” list side reads like I imagine Mary’s journaling might have read as she endured. Suffice it to say of how long or how bad my un list was the the first word listed on my be side washed it all clean. My first word was and is, forgiveness. That word is always hungry. Practically starving these days. Either from us not asking for it or extending it. I have other words listed but to look back at my list and find that is the first one to come to me, makes me think I really am Becoming.

My dream sustains me. My faith is at times is on crutches. The right crutch of hope, the left, Tom. My desire to do right guides me. My Lord loves me. My gospel is my foundation. And my heritage is worth fighting for.

Mary calls herself a handmaiden, I could never be as bold to call myself that, but my patriarchal blessing does. It is truly time for me to Become. 

Elizabeth and Mary’s stories are in Luke 1. Who is Luke? I found an article in the New Era that introduced the Four writers of the New Testament. Luke came after Christ mission and life on this earth. His stories are taken from eyewitnesses. His account from these two women don’t come from catching bits and pieces from others. They come from talking to the women themselves. What a wonderful experience he had. Talking to those that personally endured. That witnessed. That became. What a gift he has given us.