We have been taught the He has paid the price and all He expects from us is change. Lets think of that in literal terms. He paid. What did he give? He gave His blood. The atonement, or I own mint. The Lord, the great I AM (I) The Creator (own) Giver of grace and mercy (mint, where grace and mercy is stored for distribution). But more than that He gave his life. The most tangible commodity there is. He gave His blood so that we may live with Him. He gave His life that we may live, be immortal. Those two gifts are the greatest of all.
We all dream of immortality. We even have fictional characters that defy death. We also do activities that makes us feel as though we have touched deaths door and lived to tell about it. We dream of it. Some even take care to live in a way to prolong life. Death is death. A reality undefined.
To live again is one thing. That gift is given to all. It's a given. But to live with Him is another. That is where we start to pay the price. The change. Our change.
To obtain that privilege we need to have mercy and grace jingling in our pockets. And plenty of it.
How do we earn the "change" you ask, the jingle. Well lets say it something like this.
Say we feed the poor, clothe the naked, comfort those who stand in need of comfort, you have just earned a few pieces of grace. Boy don't they feel good in the depths (debts) of our empty pockets. Heck even a smile given to those we pass can earn us a little. Grace is easy, but the more we had to sacrifice the more we will earn. Anytime you go beyond yourself you pretty much got paid.
Oh mercy. That is a big one. You do need grace and mercy, mercy and grace. We can have abundance of one or the other but we have to have both. To earn mercy we can forgive, that can be easy, and then again it can be hard. The harder it is the more we earn. The mother load of mercy is forgiving ourselves. Whoa. For some that is near impossible. One, because we don't see the sin in ourselves, two, we have done something we feel is unforgivable.
Sometimes someone did something to us that we just can't let go. We are innocent, we feel. Being hurt is not a sin, holding on to the pain is. Forgive. Forgive them. Forgive yourself for how you felt or reacted to the pain.
Sometimes we hurt others. Deep. Forgive yourself for your weaknesses, forgive them even if they never forgive you.
The Lord has once said to a sinner. "Go and sin no more". Is that possible? Sin no more? It is. In a sense. No, we can not be perfect, we become perfected. But we can walk away from a sin. We won't be sinless. Just won't be a committen that sin no mor. Yes sir no mor.
By earning change we have changed. That is what the Lord wants. Our change. Change of heart. Change of ways. Change for the better.
Think of it this way "Go and change some more". Now that is how it should of been said. For me, lately I believe I have had a hole in my pocket and have lost some grace and mercy. I sure am grateful for those around me that have picked it up and put it in their own pockets. To you I say I love you. I felt your love and you deserve what I have lost. Today, tomorrow and forever I will try my darnest to earn change.
There is a Lord. He lives. He loves.
Jingle your change!
Sunday, May 3, 2015
Friday, May 1, 2015
Dead Men Tell No Tales
Have you ever envisioned a book with print on one page, and the page directly across from it blank. No illustration, no picture. I have, daily. It represents my life for the last few years.
My page tells of parents, siblings, family. Tells of a Trust (Guy and Charlene Nicoll Trust) that had no trust for me from my siblings.
How the dirt thrown on my parents caskets has metaphorically speaking, left a chasm between me and my siblings. It doesn't need to be back filled with bull crap or a bridge built across only to let the erosion persist. It needs the blank page written upon. Words, reason, thoughts. Truth.
With the sweet amen said as the graves were blessed and consecrated the trust started to erode. As we turned to our own for comfort, the plans formed.
It was decided that I would not be present (I was informed not asked) as my siblings went through my parents things. The important papers as it was described to me.
When my dad passed my mom told of a loan between my father and my husband. Now my mom passes. The Trust immediately starts on the road of no trust. The Loan wasn't due for two years. Yet they apply the loan toward my inheritance.
We were told that we can't be trusted. That we have a history of not paying our bills. That they will just apply the loan toward them buying me out of my parents house.
We tried to explain the loan, it fell on deaf ears. We got a lawyer, to explain that it was a business loan between my dad and my husband. One little side note, my dad approached Tom to loan him money. My parents just sold the old Mesa house and wanted to invest it somewhere that would give the a greater return. For collateral the Baker Machinery property would be used. I have no ownership in the property. I and my mother in law were advised years previous to sign off. Being the nature of the business someone could get injured or at the worst death. That way we couldn't be held financially accountable.
The executors of the Trust needed to know what we had paid in interest. There was no record from my parents side because my dad had complete trust in us. We on the other hand had complete records. Tom sent them a list of payments and dates. That wasn't good enough. We needed to send canceled checks. So we did. We also had those ducks in a row. We are a business for heavens sakes.
Yet they spent time finding checks that my mother wrote to me because for most of this time they lived in an apartment we owned. No rent, free utilities and free cell phones. My mother couldn't stand all this free stuff so she paid a small amount each month. The executors applied those payments toward my inheritance.
All in all the first time I met with their Trust lawyer I was told they wouldn't collect on the loan until we got paid for some property we had for sale. Yet they were collecting long before that. They had applied it toward my inheritance.
Tom does have some property for sale. Believe it or not we had to send proof to the Trust lawyer to prove it.
In 2008 the failed economy hit us hard. Dad came to us and said not to worry about interest payments until we get back on the road. He even told mom to not pay those previous talked about checks and that he would apply those toward the interest payments. Once again his idea, and his trust and his love for us shined through. That should be proof he said that because the checks stopped. Dead men tell no tales.
No the Trust would not believe the words spoken by the living for the dead. Remember we don't pay our bills.
A day before the loan was due we paid on the loan. The interest would of been paid also but that will be made when the Lord blesses us further. At least the interest won't keep accumulating.
The museum (my parents house in Vernon, that is what I call it) stands fully furnished. With all their belongings that now are my siblings belongings. I got no chance to pick anything. No chance to put my name in the hat for the lucky draw of winning something precious to me. Like they say "you can't take it with you". Nothing truer has been said.
My parents journals and photos have been hauled off also. For safe keeping from the San Juan Fire. I was asked by my sister if the house was in jeopardy of the fire. I was living up in Vernon at the time and told her I would call her if I felt we were. I didn't have to call. Not because the Lord blessed us. But because that night she drove up in darkness and took them home or shall I say from home.
This is one page in the book. Turn the page and you will see a story of how the Nicoll Brothers Ranch LLC has restricted me.
Funny one cast member is on both pages, but it plays by the same plan. No trust. No listening.
My page tells of parents, siblings, family. Tells of a Trust (Guy and Charlene Nicoll Trust) that had no trust for me from my siblings.
How the dirt thrown on my parents caskets has metaphorically speaking, left a chasm between me and my siblings. It doesn't need to be back filled with bull crap or a bridge built across only to let the erosion persist. It needs the blank page written upon. Words, reason, thoughts. Truth.
With the sweet amen said as the graves were blessed and consecrated the trust started to erode. As we turned to our own for comfort, the plans formed.
It was decided that I would not be present (I was informed not asked) as my siblings went through my parents things. The important papers as it was described to me.
When my dad passed my mom told of a loan between my father and my husband. Now my mom passes. The Trust immediately starts on the road of no trust. The Loan wasn't due for two years. Yet they apply the loan toward my inheritance.
We were told that we can't be trusted. That we have a history of not paying our bills. That they will just apply the loan toward them buying me out of my parents house.
We tried to explain the loan, it fell on deaf ears. We got a lawyer, to explain that it was a business loan between my dad and my husband. One little side note, my dad approached Tom to loan him money. My parents just sold the old Mesa house and wanted to invest it somewhere that would give the a greater return. For collateral the Baker Machinery property would be used. I have no ownership in the property. I and my mother in law were advised years previous to sign off. Being the nature of the business someone could get injured or at the worst death. That way we couldn't be held financially accountable.
The executors of the Trust needed to know what we had paid in interest. There was no record from my parents side because my dad had complete trust in us. We on the other hand had complete records. Tom sent them a list of payments and dates. That wasn't good enough. We needed to send canceled checks. So we did. We also had those ducks in a row. We are a business for heavens sakes.
Yet they spent time finding checks that my mother wrote to me because for most of this time they lived in an apartment we owned. No rent, free utilities and free cell phones. My mother couldn't stand all this free stuff so she paid a small amount each month. The executors applied those payments toward my inheritance.
All in all the first time I met with their Trust lawyer I was told they wouldn't collect on the loan until we got paid for some property we had for sale. Yet they were collecting long before that. They had applied it toward my inheritance.
Tom does have some property for sale. Believe it or not we had to send proof to the Trust lawyer to prove it.
In 2008 the failed economy hit us hard. Dad came to us and said not to worry about interest payments until we get back on the road. He even told mom to not pay those previous talked about checks and that he would apply those toward the interest payments. Once again his idea, and his trust and his love for us shined through. That should be proof he said that because the checks stopped. Dead men tell no tales.
No the Trust would not believe the words spoken by the living for the dead. Remember we don't pay our bills.
A day before the loan was due we paid on the loan. The interest would of been paid also but that will be made when the Lord blesses us further. At least the interest won't keep accumulating.
The museum (my parents house in Vernon, that is what I call it) stands fully furnished. With all their belongings that now are my siblings belongings. I got no chance to pick anything. No chance to put my name in the hat for the lucky draw of winning something precious to me. Like they say "you can't take it with you". Nothing truer has been said.
My parents journals and photos have been hauled off also. For safe keeping from the San Juan Fire. I was asked by my sister if the house was in jeopardy of the fire. I was living up in Vernon at the time and told her I would call her if I felt we were. I didn't have to call. Not because the Lord blessed us. But because that night she drove up in darkness and took them home or shall I say from home.
This is one page in the book. Turn the page and you will see a story of how the Nicoll Brothers Ranch LLC has restricted me.
Funny one cast member is on both pages, but it plays by the same plan. No trust. No listening.
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